Acceptance is something that many people strive for. Unfortunately, the more they want it, the less likely they are to get it.

The desire for acceptance makes you do things that you might not otherwise do. It might get you in major trouble, and often leaves you disappointed with the results you get.  Reality is that when acceptance becomes so important that you have to have it is when it's really not worth having at all, unless of course it's accepting yourself as you are.

Throughout my years of dating, I worked for the approval of certain women who didn't give me the time of day. Funny, if I knew then, what I know now, I wouldn't have given them the time of day. At one point, I learned how to become the right person, to find the right person to be in a relationship with. It was at that point that several of these women who I had previously shown interest in began to become interested in me. I had checked out because I had figured out who they really were.

In business, in the past I have struggled to gain acceptance from certain business leaders in the community and elsewhere. It was at the point where I no longer desired their approval that the tide changed and they were interested in what I said and did. By that time, once again, I had lost interest in relationships with them because I learned who they really were. Once again, I had accepted myself and my ability. I understood my capabilities.

When you accept yourself, you have a new found confidence. You no longer question your own ability. You don't have anything to prove and you can concentrate on doing the right thing, while respecting others.

If acceptance from someone else is critical to your mission, you need to step back and reconsider your mission.  Putting someone on a pedestal simply sets them up for a hard fall when you realize that they aren't everything that you want them to be.

When the only acceptance you need is your own internally, you will find it much easier to get the approval you desire elsewhere.