People that don't know you will be quick to define you when you let them do it. In fact, don't define yourself and you'll be defined soon enough.

A friend of mine told me of a story how a buddy defined him as a wolverine and proceeded to say that wolverines let others do the kill and then they take the meet. The guy totally missed who my friend really is, and he thought he was giving my friend a compliment, but needless to say the friendship didn't go anywhere.

My friend, who didn't really get that the guy was talking about in business and that he actually respected that, was offended and didn't want to be seen as a wolverine. But what if my friend had instead called himself the wolverine?

I'm sure that there would have been all kinds of people that would have found that interesting and wanted to know more. He'd attract more attention, and as people got to know him, they'd respect him even more, because they'd find out he's nothing like a wolverine, but he's a caring human being that would go out of his way to help others out.

The definition causes others to attract and listen allowing him to share who he really is and those people become even more interested as they see what a great guy he is.

When you control your image you can deliver the message you really want people to see. When you let others control your image, you're giving up any chance to show people who you really are!